“Play”ing the Piano - Cultivating Joyful Piano Practice for Your Child
As a parent you have a very important role in your child learning to play the piano. What you do can influence the way your child views music making and learning an instrument. You may have unpleasant memories from your own childhood that have shaped how you look at music. Maybe those experiences led you to stop your musical pursuits. If so, those negative feelings could transfer to your child if you’re not careful. It is important that you look at this new experience for your child in a fresh way. Let’s go through some things you can do to help make learning an instrument joyful, playful, and intriguing to your child.
BE EXCITED!
The number one thing that you can do to help your child in their piano pursuits is be excited!!! Your child looks to you to decide what is valuable and what is a chore. Piano practice very easily can slip into something that goes on the “to do” list and feels the same as making a bed or doing the dishes. It doesn’t have to be that way if you show interest, curiosity, and excitement toward what your child is learning and how they are growing in piano class.
If you are excited, your child will be too. Your enthusiasm will transfer to your child and they will see piano as valuable. Phrases like “Ryan, you haven’t practiced the piano today, go do it now or you can’t go outside,” teach children that piano practice is boring and not in itself a joy to participate in. Playing the piano should be what is stated in its name, “playing”. It should be treated as such and the experience itself should be valued and enjoyed. You have the unique opportunity to model to your child that piano is “play” and is a time to have fun, fill curiosity and create. Traditionally piano has been taught by rote memorization and monotonous repetition. Children quickly lose interest in this process when they don’t see the purpose in it or feel the value of it. Yet, children love repetition when it is rewarding. They will play the same games over and over solely because they find joy in the process of playing the game. You can help your child practice the piano with an engaged thinking mind and encourage them to try things that interest and excite them.
2. PRACTICE WITH YOUR CHILD
Because you are such an important part in teaching your child to value this experience, I encourage you to NOT send your child off to practice by themselves (unless under the unique circumstances that they choose to do this naturally and love to play on their own). Instead, I encourage you to say things like:
“Will you teach me that Tiger song you learned at piano class? I love that one. I think it’s my favorite.”
Or “Let’s play the ‘Piano Friends’ song for dad and try his name in it.”
Or “You played that one so well, let’s video tape it and send it to Grandma.”
Or “What do you think that song would sound like if we play it high on the piano? Do you think it would sound like a different animal?”
Or “how many white keys can you play?” “How many black keys?” “You play the white keys like raindrops and I’ll play the black keys like thunder and we’ll make a rainstorm.”
Or “Let’s put on a concert today for all your stuffed animals.”
Or “Ohhhh, that was so beautiful!! I loved how you got soft at the end.”
Or “Can you show me how to make an ‘O’ shape with my fingers like your teacher taught you? Is this right?”
Or “That’s not easy. I’m going to try it a few times to get the feeling. You want to try it with me?”
Or “Let’s play this one together at the same time.”
Or “We haven’t tried that one with the music. I wonder what that would sound like.”
Or “I’m going to play a bongo drum while you play that song” (maybe it’s just a pot and a wooden spoon). “Then let’s switch.”
3. VEER OFF THE ASSIGNMENT
Be creative, experiment with the concepts that are taught and PLAY. Make it fun, follow the interests and uniqueness of your child and do things in ways that are interesting to them. And then stay positive and encouraging and be their biggest cheerleader. Make up your own songs. It’s ok if you don’t have any experience with the piano. Try something and listen to what you like and don’t like. Encourage your child to do the same. Make up stories and tell them with notes on the piano as you see fit. Try to figure out a song that they like by trial and error (Star Wars melody, Harry Potter…). You don’t need any instructions, just have fun and try.
4. WATCH YOUR CHILD.
Pay close attention to your child and their interests. Don’t spend too much time on one activity. Five minutes is about the maximum time you can spend on one thing before your child loses interest. So, change things up. Maybe add some movement activities in between the piano activities. Like, maybe put on a classical piece of music and dance to it. Or pull out some rhythm instruments and play along to a piece of music. Or march, skip, jump around the room as you sing the lyrics to the song they are learning. When their interest fades with your current activity, change it up or call it a day and tell them what a great job they’ve done. Think of specific things that impressed you during their practice and express those thoughts to them.
5. STAY POSITIVE.
It can be easy to slip into a power struggle at the piano if you try to teach your child the assignments and are constantly correcting their behaviors. Instead, have them teach you the assignments. Your child will learn more by having to teach the concept to you because they will have to think through the assignment to help you. Say only positive things to your child while you are at the piano. If you see that they are not quite getting something, ask them questions. For example, if their fingers aren’t round enough, you can say “Can you show me how to make an ‘O’ with my fingers? Is this round enough? (And when they show you how) Oh wow, you really are good at rounding those fingers. Thanks for helping me.”
6. MAKE MUSIC EVERYDAY.
Make music making a part of every day. Creating a routine helps with this. Maybe you play music after breakfast. Or maybe you play music when mom comes home because she loves it so much and can’t wait to play songs with you. Pick a time that makes sense for your family, and when your child isn’t tired and exhausted. If you make it random, then it’s likely not going to happen, so create a daily trigger that reminds you it’s time for music making. Remind them of the routine by saying things like, “I can’t wait to play the piano with you today after lunch.” Not only does this create a sense of anticipation, but it sets the expectation of what the day is going to be like. Daily engagement in music is what will help your child progress in their skills and they will like this process if you keep it joyful.
I know it takes time and effort to help your child learn these skills and but I can assure you this effort will make a huge difference in your child’s attitude toward learning an instrument. With your help, music making can be a joyful, intriguing, rewarding experience that your child can enjoy through their entire life.
